Overheard In Fort Lauderdale
Leatherman: "Is there anything more depressing than wasting $50 and 4 hours of your Saturday night.... and the hottest person at the baths is YOURSELF?"
Bill's Filling Station
Bear #1: "Honey, nobody has seen you in forever! You are looking so great! Everybody's saying so!"
Bear #2: "Thank you! You're so sweet! It's because I've been a slave for almost two years now, and I'm so happy with my Master. It's so freeing when you finally belong somewhere."
Bear #1: "And that would be chained to the bed, I assume?"
Twinkie: (waving money at the muscular bartender) "Hey, there! Hello? Please tell me you love me. I need somebody to love me right now!"
Bartender (straining to hear over music): "WHAT? You need what?"
Twinkie: "I need you to love me!"
Bartender: "I don't even know you. How could I love you?"
Twinkie: "What do you need to know?"
Bartender: "How old are you?"
Twinkie: "I just turned 18!"
Bartender: "Hello, my love."
Patron in the bathroom line: "Man! This party has been amazing! All these hot circuit boys! And it's already 4AM and they haven't had to call a SINGLE ambulance!"
Other patron: "Give it time, honey. Give it time."
Bartender to customer: "I'm having a problem with your boyfriend, in the liking department."
Drunk guy: "Hey man, your friend is so fucking hot. You gotta hook us up!"
Other guy: My friend? Which one?
Drunk guy: I don't care!
Guy At Bar: "How come you haven't been dancing? You're not digging the music?"
Other Guy: "Um...I think we could probably put the last three hours of music on a disc, take it down to Guantanamo, broadcast it over the prison PA.... and we'd have those Al Qaedas begging to confess."
(Disclosure: I am Other Guy.)
Customer: "Hey can you play a song for me? I heard it on the radio today and it totally rocks."
DJ: "What's it called?"
Customer: "Well, I don't the name of it, but you've got to have it. It's by a black girl and it's about love.