Harlem Hate Church To Hold Manhattan March Against "Sodomite Cannibals"

Harlem hate Pastor James David Manning today announced that his church will soon march against "sodomite cannibals" in Manhattan because the gays are planning to become Night Of The Living Dead homo-zombies.

Manning: "God Almighty has given me the revelation that soon, after the court announces that they are to be protected by the Constitution to be sodomites, they're gonna also start cannibalism. Every sodomite, every lesbo, every homo, every fag, every transvestite, every LBGT person - by the year 2016 - will have participated in some sort of cannibalism. Because they are demon-possessed. And they will do it with a smile on their faces. In fact, they will be scourging through and rummaging through the hospital waste looking for human waste. A number of people are going to go missing and only their bones will show up."

(Tipped by JMG reader John)

Headline Of The Day

From the New York Post:

He’s really sinking his teeth into single life. Just months out of jail, “Cannibal Cop” Gilberto Valle is seeking a gal who suits his taste — in an online dating profile that lists “cooking” as a favorite hobby. The Match.com profile proclaims that Valle — who was found guilty of plotting to cook and eat his now-ex-wife, a conviction which a judge later tossed — is seeking a “non-judgmental” woman who’s “a little kinky ;).” Under the handle “AmicableOne14,” the 30-year-old, disgraced former NYPD officer notes he’s a big foodie looking for a woman age 24 to 32 who likes cooking, dining out and wine tasting. Valle, who was released from jail in July, is under a “supervised release” schedule in which he must make curfew. Valle was freed on $100,000 bond after a surprise ruling that tossed his conviction for scheming to kidnap, kill, cook and eat his then-wife and other women — because a judge claimed it was all fantasy. Valle admitted to engaging in depraved online interactions but claimed he never ­in­tend­ed to carry out the grisly plots.

The Girl From Empanada

Three Brazilians have gone on trial for murdering women and selling their remains to their neighbors as meat pies. Via the Associated Press:

Three people charged with killing at least two women, eating parts of their bodies and using their flesh to make and sell stuffed pastries went on trial Thursday in northeastern Brazil. The man, his wife and his mistress were arrested in April 2012 in the city of Garanhuns and police say they have confessed to the crimes. The three allegedly lured women to their house by promising them a job as a nanny. Police found the remains of the two women in the backyard of the suspects' house. At the time of their arrest they told police they belonged to a sect that preached "the purification of the world and the reduction of its population."

I denounce myself for using that headline. And you for the inevitable Sweeney Todd jokes.

Bath Salts Go Pop

I'm kinda liking this, surprisingly, although I'm guessing Miley Cyrus' legal team might have a slight problem with the chorus.

Rubio Releases First Communion Doc: I Told You I Was Totally Not A Mormon!

Because the talibangelicals would totally lose their shit if BOTH dudes on their ticket were Mormons, today Sen. Marco Rubio issued the above document showing that the first time he ate the flesh of Jesus was at the age of 13.

Fava Beans And A Nice Chianti

Another gay cannibal?

A gay Yorkshire man has been charged with murder in the death of a man he picked up. The naked body of Damian Oldfield, 33, was found in a house in Harehills following remarks the suspect made at a local takeout restaurant. Police said that part of Oldfield's right leg had been cut out and pieces of diced meat were discovered in pot on a kitchen stove.

Forensic tests on the meat showed it to be human. Investigators say they do not know how much of the leg had been eaten. Anthony Francis Morley, 35, is in jail awaiting trial. Police say they do not know how Oldfield and Morley met and have appealed to the gay community for help. Oldfield worked as an advertising salesman on a Leeds-based magazine. Colleagues say they are shocked at the killing.

Surely you remember Armin Meiwes, the gay German cannibal whose 2001 personal ad said, "If you are between 18 and 25 years old, you are my boy. Come to me and I eat your horny flesh." One of the men responding to Meiwes' ad voluntarily allowed himself to be castrated and then he and Meiwes sauteed and ate his penis together. When the organ donor's body was found, Meiwes had consumed at least 40 lbs of it. Meiwes was sentenced to life in prison last year.

I'm not even gonna see what the Freepers say about this one. Probably something like: "The liberal-controlled MSM will never let this story onto the front page. They don't want America to KNOW the truth about how many "gay" people engage in cannibalism!!"