A Fitbit For Your Naughty Bits

Via the Business Times:

These days, everything we own is becoming "smart" - from the smart watch, smart TV, and smart fridge, to the smart fitness tracker and smart glasses - so it should come as no surprise that now smart wearable technology is coming to sex toys too. Meet Lovely, a penis ring now on Indiegogo that does way more than just vibrate – its built-in sensors send data to an accompanying smartphone app in order to track your sexual performance, give you tips on what you could do better next time, and count how many calories you've burned. Made from medical-grade silicone, Lovely's primary function is still, of course, to perform as a sex toy. The creators claim that it can enhance erections by preventing blood from leaving the organ, and the tulip-like design was chosen as it is able to transfer vibrations to the clitoris "in just the right spot" during intercourse.

Are you wearing your smart cock ring, darling? Over at the device's crowdfunding page, it's also being pitched the LGBT market.

(Tipped by JMG reader Daddy Ray)

The Dildo Of Death

Literally. Via Awesomely Luvvie:

I don’t understand humanity sometimes, and of course we’re heading for doom. Stephen Hawking said so and now I’m sure of it. I read an article yesterday about a dildo you can order with your loved one’s ashes inside. Don’t let something like death preclude your boo from having a hand in your pleasure life. DON’T LET IT. It is called 21 Grams, and was created by a dude named Mark Sturkenboom. He put the dildo as part of a package of mementos for your lost love. And it comes in a music box that is opened with a necklace. Is this travel-friendly? Let’s say you’re going somewhere and you’re not checking in your luggage, will be you able to take this through airport security? Will TSA stop you and confiscate your Ash Rabbit? Is this guaranteed to never break? I hope this dildo is sealed REALLY well because if it breaks somehow and powder of the dead ends up in your vaginal walls… talk about traumatic. 

Ash Rabbit. Hit the link for many hysterical comments. This one put me on the floor: "If you can’t make them come back from the dead, at least the dead can make you come from the back." (Tipped by JMG reader Jeff)

Vandals Deflate Paris Butt Plug

Via the Independent:

A giant inflatable ‘Christmas tree’ appears to have been vandalised overnight on Friday, hours after its creator admitted being partly inspired by a joke about an anal sex toy. The controversial piece entitled ‘Tree’ by US artist Paul McCarthy was erected over the Place Vendome in Paris as part of the FIAC international art festival. Its 80ft high presence immediately drew outcry from some residents, who said Paris had been “humiliated” by the installation. Others dismissed the sculpture as a "provocation" and called for its removal.

The artist says the piece will be re-inflated. (Tipped by JMG reader Buxton)