Main | Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Answer To Conservapedia

I love Dickipedia.
Elisabeth Hasselbeck (née Filarski; born May 28, 1977) is a former reality show contestant—not even the winner, mind you, or even the runner-up—who somehow became co-host of one of the most popular daytime talk shows of all time, and a dick. Though not especially well informed, Hasselbeck is, nonetheless, an irritatingly vocal supporter of conservative viewpoints. Also, she bears a striking resemblance to one of those “It’s a Small World” animatronic robots they have at Disneyland, if those robots were programmed by Sean Hannity.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck is a panelist on The View, the program that pioneered the format of four women jabbering over each other for an hour and a half, interspersed with commercials for Boniva and a special kind of yogurt that promises to regulate your bowels. In this capacity, Hasselbeck’s main duties involve baiting the other panelists to drop the F-bomb on national TV and attaining a level of shrillness that would make most testicles re-ascend. Of course, anyone with external genitalia really has no business watching The View, so it would serve them right.

Because she enjoys such incredible exposure, many liberals consider Elisabeth Hasselbeck one of the country’s most dangerous conservatives. They might be on to something. As it has been proven time and again, Americans love them a televised idiot. In late October 2008, Whoopi Goldberg revealed that Elisabeth Hasselbeck receives more death threats than any other View panelist. That must be an awful lot of death threats.

Rush Limbaugh's is pretty great too.

Labels: , , ,

comments powered by Disqus