I Almost Got Sexed Tonight

Early this evening I was almost an extra in the Sex And The City movie, which is filming an outdoor restaurant scene on my street. Coming out of the Gracious Home hardware store, glamorously carrying a spray-bottle of Krud Kutter, I paused on the sidewalk to laugh at the dozens of silly women waving cell-cams in a vain hope of catching sight of Big and SJP.

A crew member marched down the sidewalk, yelling at people to get out the shot. And I was ready to comply when she barked, "Dammit, background needs to stay behind the tape!" Then she shooed me across some blue tape on the sidewalk over to a group of pretend Upper East Siders whom I presume were waiting for a cue to pretend they weren't waiting.

I stood there for about thirty seconds, thinking, "Oh, boy...is this great!" Then I thought, "Thank Zod I trimmed my beard today!" And then, "Shit. I would be dressed for scrubbing floors right now." Then I remembered why I'd cut my visit to the hardware store so short - I really, really had to pee. Ah, well. Fame is fleeting. Besides, my credit would have probably been "Old Janitor." Back to reality and grout removal.