Big Bad John (Cornyn)
You probably best know Dubya's BFF and major asshat U.S. Sen. John Cornyn (R-TX) from his 2004 quote about the Federal Marriage Amendment: "It does not affect your daily life very much if your neighbor marries a box turtle. But that does not mean it is right ... [N]ow you must raise your children up in a world where that union of man and box turtle is on the same legal footing as man and wife."
But Cornyn may have outdone himself with this new campaign ad. "He kept Texas in power and made lesser states squirm!" The Daily Show has already done a great parody and I'll post it here when it becomes available.
Also: Poor Jimmy Dean.