Pope Denounces Gay Marriage

Speaking to an estimated crowd of 1.5 million, yesterday Emperor Palpatine told pilgrims at Spain's World Youth Day that marriage could only exist between a man and woman.

"The Lord calls many people to marriage, in which a man and a woman, in becoming one flesh, find fulfilment in a profound life of communion," he told the young pilgrims. "For this reason, to acknowledge the beauty and goodness of marriage is to realize that only a setting of fidelity and indissolubility, along with an openness to God's gift of live, is adequate to the grandeur and dignity of marital love." The Roman Catholic Church has condemned the sweeping liberal reforms brought in by Spain's Socialist government in recent years, including easier access to abortion, gay marriage and fast-track divorce.

Ill Papa was unable to finish his address because God decided to whip up a violent thunderstorm, knocking off Benedict's tiara and blowing over the tent on the stage. SRSLY.