Charlie Crist Comes Out....Against Gay Marriage

Florida Gov. Charlie "Closet Case" Crist has reversed his previous "live and let live" position on gay marriage, saying that he now supports the ballot referendum to amend the state's constitutional against gay couples. Gay marriage is already illegal in Florida, but as in other states, the haters want to make it extra illegal.

Crist has also finally responded to rumors about his sexuality and that he is only engaged to Halloween costume heiress Carol Rome in order to get on John McCain's ticket.

The governor says he's not surprised that some people think he's getting married, to improve his chances of being picked by John McCain as the Repubican vice-presidential candidate. He said nothing could be further from the truth.

Governor Crist also responded to rumors about his sexuality. A reporter asked Crist his reaction to some people's preoccupation with his sexuality, and sexual orientation. Crist responded, "Well, you know, when you're in the public eye, and being governor of Florida that's inevitable, you know, I don't really focus on it, I'm just damn glad I found such a wonderful lady."

He was also asked if rumors about his sexual orientation or other rumors that he may be a heterosexual serial philanderer bother him. Governor Crist replied, "Well, lack of truth always would be disturbing to somebody."

It doesn't look like Crist will be McCain's veep anyway, but at least ole Charlie now has a limitless supply of beards.