This Week In Holy Crimes

Over the last seven days....

Ontario: Pastor Ronald Burning arrested on eight counts of sexual assault on minors, including rape.
Pennsylvania: Rev. Kirk Caldwell arrested for murdering his son on Christmas Day.
California: Pastor Samuel Chai Cho Oh arrested for immigration fraud scheme. Oh allegedly collected $40K-$50K a month from people posing as students in return for visas.
Texas: Pastor Matt Baker indicted for murdering his wife.
England: Rev. Tim Jones under fire for saying it's OK for poor people to shoplift, as long as they only steal from chain stores.
California: Msgr. Richard Loomis granted immunity to testify before a grand jury investigating the Archdiocese of Los Angeles for covering up child molestation by priests. Lommis has said that Cardinal Roger Mahoney ordered him not to contact police about sexual abuse cases.
New York: In a secret trial, the Catholic diocese of Rockville exonerates Father Alan Placa of child molestation charges. Placa is a close friend of Rudy Giuliani.
Cincinnati: Pastor Jeff Kilburn and his wife charged with "sexual imposition" and felony child endangerment of a 16 year-old boy.
Georgia: Pastor Segun Masha accused of running a Toys For Tots scam by charging parents to make copies of their Social Security cards, supposedly to confirm how many children they had.
New York: Rabbi Naftali Tzi Weisz convicted of multimillion dollar money laundering scheme.
Florida: Pastor Darrell Gilyard, already imprisoned for molesting a female minor, has admitted fathering the child of a woman who has accused him of rape. Gilyard was once considered the "next great preacher" of the Southern Baptists.

This Week's Winner-
Ireland: Two more bishops have resigned in Ireland's widening child abuse scandal. A total of four bishops have now stepped down, with pressure building for the fifth bishop named in the Murphy Report to do the same. Bishops Eamonn Walsh, Raymond Field, James Moriarty, and Donal Murray have all offered their resignations in the last ten days. The Dublin Archdiocese is accused of shielding more than 170 priests from prosecution, usually by transferring them to other parishes.