Blücher!

The lawyer for a Connecticut man who was arrested for fisting a female horse (SRSLY) is asking the court to show his client lenience because he's a devout Christian without a previous criminal record.

“Mr. Wegiel has never been arrested for any crime before this, and I think he is eligible,” Crozier said. Crozier said Wegiel denies abusing the horse. Crozier said Wegiel is a “decent human being,” who has been “churchgoing all his life.” Crozier said he has dozens of letters from people who wrote in support of Wegiel, such as friends and fellow parishioners. Wegiel is due back in court March 11, when a judge will decide if he should be allowed into the program. It is for first-time offenders, and it is generally not permitted in serious cases. Christine Flannery of Shelton, whose family owns three horses, including Indiana, which Wegiel is accused of abusing, attended the court proceeding. Afterward, she said she objects to Wegiel being allowed into the program. “It would be a slap on the wrist,” Flannery said. “He deserves more punishment.”

Police were called when Flannery found Wegiel with "his hand and arm inside the horse's vagina." Wegiel says that was totally an accident. The above-linked story observes that the two male horses in the corral were not touched. Cuz that'd be gay, dude.