Today's Gay Etiquette Question

From Steven Petrow's Civil Behavior column in the New York Times comes this question:

Q. Dear Civil Behavior: I’d like your advice in coming out as H.I.V. positive to friends and colleagues. I’m married to a wonderful man, 51, and have lived quite well with the virus for 15 years. I believe it’s important for the many others still finding out they are H.I.V. positive to see people like me who are living well and openly with the infection. While I’ve never specifically hidden the fact of my serostatus, it’s always been a bit of work to tell others. I find there’s concern that I’m sick. Some people fear I have a potentially life-threatening disease, others say they are “sorry” (what are they sorry for?), while still others imply that my behavior led to my infection (“he should have known better”). From your perspective, what’s your advice on how (or if) people who learn that they’re H.I.V. positive should tell others (I’m not asking about dating situations). And, how do you recommend that those I tell respond to my disclosure?” — Timothy Rodrigues, Healdsburg, Calif.

Give us your answer then hit the link for Petrow's response.