IRELAND: Ben & Jerry's Say Yes Equality

(Tipped by JMG reader Erik)

Eliza Doolittle Would Approve

Ben & Jerry's has issued this Cockney flavor in the UK to support the marriage equality movement.

The ice cream maker is also teaming up with Stonewall to launch a new Facebook app today that asks users to ‘marry’ each other online. ‘Proposing’ through Ben and Jerry’s, users can voice their support for marriage equality and add their name to a letter to prime minister David Cameron backing the move. Laura Doughty, Stonewall’s Deputy CEO says “We’re truly moved by Ben and Jerry’s support for same-sex marriage in Britain. “All people want is to call their long-term relationship by the same name as everyone else. Our strong advice to those who disapprove of same-sex marriage is just not to get married to someone of the same sex.”

Ben & Jerry's Vs Citizens United

Ben & Jerry's has launched a drive to overturn Citizens United, the Supreme Court ruling that allows corporations to make unlimited donations to political campaigns.

There’s way too much money in American politics. It’s drowning out people’s voices, especially since the Supreme Court’s Citizens United decision gave corporations the green light to spend limitless sums of money to influence our elections. We are building a movement of engaged citizens and responsible business leaders working together to oppose this decision and Get the Dough Out of Politics. Our goal is to take back American democracy, and over-rule the Supreme Court, with a Constitutional Amendment that will keep corporate money out of our elections. We call on Congress to pass a Constitutional Amendment that overturns Citizens United and gets the money out of politics.

Amendments to the federal constitution are spectacularly difficult and laborious to make, which is why we haven't seen one in many decades. But if ever one had a chance....

Ben & Jerry's Supports OWS

Those dirty hippies at Ben & Jerry's are expressing solidarity with Occupy Wall Street. Our tipster wonders what the sure to be coming new flavor might be called.

AFA Boycotts Schweddy Balls

The American Family Association is calling for a national boycott of Ben & Jerry's because of their latest flavor, Schweddy Balls. They've also sent the ice cream maker a letter demanding a halt to the flavor's distribution. From an AFA press release:

Ben & Jerry's announced their newest ice cream flavor which sounds anything but appealing. Schweddy Balls is the best they could come up with. The vulgar new flavor has turned something as innocent as ice cream into something repulsive. Not exactly what you want a child asking for at the supermarket. In the past, Ben & Jerry's has released controversial ice creams, like a special edition of Chubby Hubby called Hubby Hubby last year which celebrated gay marriage. It seems that offending customers has become an annual tradition for Ben & Jerry's.

War, natural disasters, poverty, ICE CREAM. Priorities!

Schweddy Balls Ice Cream

It exists.

Ben & Jerry For New York Marriage

Peter LaBarbera Suggests Other New Flavors For Ben & Jerry

Porno Peter LaBarbera is outraged, outraged I tells ya, that Ben & Jerry temporarily named a flavor Hubby Hubby in honor of same-sex marriage coming to Vermont.

"Besides the health aspects, there’s also the fact that homosexual behavior is opposed by God, and that’s something that we should take seriously. All homosexual behavior is sinful, and regardless of what liberals say or what Ben & Jerry’s puts on a tub of ice cream, that remains the case. The left is really making a fool of itself when it comes to homosexuality. They talk about transparency, but they don’t want to tell anybody about the health risks of homosexual behavior. They claim to follow God and to be Christian, and yet they celebrate all the things that God opposes … abortion, homosexuality. This is just par for the course."

LaBarbera suggests the following additional flavors for those dirty commie leftist homo-hugging ice cream makers (his own fruity fonts):

Bisexual Butter Pecan
Strawberry for Swingers
Man-Boy Munch ‘n Crunch
Catamite Carmel
Two Moms Macadamia
Rumpy Road
Polyamory Peach
Neapolitan Nancy-Boy
Fabulous Fudge Nut
Transgender Twirl
Berry Berry Promiscuous
Chunky Chickenhawk
Apple Adultery Delight

Here's a few flavors I'd name after Porno Pete:

-Needledick Nutjob
-Christ-On-A-Stick
-Closet Case Crunch
-Comb-over Classic
-Waahbulance Whirl

Now you....

Hubby Hubby

In honor of same-sex marriages beginning today in Vermont, ice cream makers Ben & Jerry have temporarily renamed one of their most popular flavors.

“The legalization of marriage for gay and lesbian couples in Vermont is certainly a step in the right direction, and something worth celebrating with peace, love - and plenty of ice cream,” Ben & Jerry’s CEO Walt Freese said in announcing the sugary switch. Ben & Jerry’s, which has long backed liberal causes, plans to rebrand “Chubby Hubby” as “Hubby Hubby” for 30 days to show support for Vermont’s new law. The move is mostly symbolic, as Burlington-based Ben & Jerry’s isn’t changing labels on “Chubby Hubby” pints sold in stores.

Free Hubby Hubby will be handed out by Ben & Jerry's trucks "across Vermont" today. Too bad they won't be shipped to retail, that's a real collectors' item right there.