Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Can You Hear Me Now? (Thud)

New York City fired first in the latest round of the nanny-state oneupsmanship wars, banning trans-fats in its restaurants. California responded with the proposed calories-on-the-menu rule, seen a couple of posts below this one. Not to be upstaged, NYC is now pitching a "No iPods or cellphones in the intersection" rule, citing a spate of pedestrians mowed down because they couldn't hear traffic or shouted warnings. Thank Jeebus our cops have solved those pesky rape and murder issues and have plenty of time to write earphone tickets. Soon to be outlawed: bad posture. Slouching kills, people!
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Animal Farm

I don't belong to the website Bear411 but many of my friends do. The site bills itself as the "top bear website" and boasts over 100,000 members. Over the years, I've heard from a few of my friends that they have had difficulty getting a membership to the site, presumably because they don't meet the bear "standard", namely that they are not large or furry or large AND furry.

Is this a plain and simple discretionary policy from an afficianado site that wants to stay focused on a certain physical ideal? Or is it discrimination? How about if you heard that Asian guys are apparently routinely denied membership? Read Jeffrey's LiveJournal entry, "My Bear411 Discrimination Story." And read Little.Yellow.Different uberblogger Ernie Hsiung's experience with the site, "Running With The Bears." An anti-Bear411 site called Bear411 Sucks presents a list of grievances.

So what do you think, bears and non-bears? Does a social networking / hook-up site have the right to exclude members that don't meet a self-imposed physical ideal? Is such a thing even possible when it comes to an identity as nebulous as "bear"?
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Californanny State

State Senator Carole Migden (D-SF), a potential San Francisco mayoral candidate, has proposed a bill which will require all chain restaurants, even those with only one California location, to post the caloric count for their food items in "plain view" on menus or menu boards. I've seen these sort of posters in McDonald's and Burger King, usually hidden behind a tall plant, but it seems a bit much to require them on menus. It certainly will suck a little fun out of eating out. Not to mention all that extra eye-rolling from your server while you debate the fat content of the entrees with your dining partners. (Begin looking down your noses at chain restaurants in 3...2...1....)
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Man Candy

-Via Daily Kos.
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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Haggard "Completely" Heterosexual

Ted Haggard is completely heterosexual. And in other news, I love pussy. "Completely."
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Mr. Deity


This weekend I was hipped to the latest YouTube phenom, Mr.Deity, a series of hilarious film shorts that skewer Christian dogma, starring a nelly, distracted Mr.Deity as director of the universe and his Smithers-ish assistant, Larry. And check out the super-hot faux-hawked Jesus that appears in Episode 2.
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Map Obsessed

I live to the right of the #1. But the real reason for this post is that some dude has created a downloadable NYC subway map for your iPod. Get it here.
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The Name Is Familiar, But....

Back in the '80s, I used to call my roommate "the keeper of my tricks", because I seemed to have a hard time remembering the guys I was meeting. I'd point out some hot guy to my roommate and he'd say, "Oh, him. You already did him. He's from Boston. Nice guy. Has a convertible." Oops.

Those days are long over. The numbers are down and my memory is up, apparently. But if things were still like they were, I'd be tempted to blame "prosopagnosia", this "facial-blindness" condition that I've been seeing lots of news stories about recently. Facial-blindness is a brain dysfunction that prevents people from remembering the faces of people they've seen before. I wonder if it strikes gay men more than others, or if a lot of us are just faking it.
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Monday, February 05, 2007

Giuliani Tosses His Asbestos-Laden Hat

Thanks to the hard work and dedication of Osama bin Ladin, former NYC mayor Rudy Giuliani has officially become a 2008 presidential candidate. Giuliani, one of the most reviled public servants in New York City history (no mean feat), became an almost mythic national figure in the aftermath of 9/11 as he skillfully posed on steel rubble and mastered the art of the doleful, woeful press conference.

As the world gazed misty-eyed at the newly-minted "America's Mayor", forgotten were the Abner Louima and Amadou Diallo police brutality scandals. Forgotten were the sweet insider deals granted large corporations at the expense of city public spaces. Forgotten was Giuliani's censorship of the arts and his crackdown on NYC nightlife. And most outrageously, forgotten is Giuliani's unforgivably stupid pre-9/11 mistake of relocating the city's Office Of Emergency Management to the World Trade Center, which had already suffered a terrorist attack. Idiocy! He's the perfect Republican candidate.

UPDATE: Watch the Freepers salivate and wet themselves in delight as they live-blog Giuiliani's appearance on Hannity & Cole. They like him, they really like him.
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HomoQuotable - Ted Haggard

"Jesus is starting to put me back together. I have spent so much time in repentance, brokenness, hurt and sorrow for the things I've done and the negative impact my actions have had on others." - Ted Haggard, in an email accidentally sent to a Colorado radio station, in which he announces that he and his wife have decided to leave Colorado Springs and pursue online degrees in...wait for it...psychology. (via Newspeak.)
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"I Will Fucking Destroy You"

I had a rather strange encounter at the Eagle last night. I was wearing the Piggly Wiggly t-shirt that my buddy Little Tom bought me when he visited San Francisco for Mac World last month. Tom and I were leaning on the pool table under the big screen playing the Super Bowl when a guy a pointed at me and made a strange face. Tom said, "Who's that?" I was about to say "No idea" when the guy marched over and demanded, "What's up with that shirt, dude?" I said, "It's a grocery store chain in the south." He said, "I know THAT. My name is John and I'm from New York City and I will fucking DESTROY you!" Tom backed away nervously. I said, "Um, OK. My name is Joe." The guy grabbed my hand and gave me one of those macho shithead bone-crushing handshakes. "Your name is Joe? That's all you GOT?" And then he went back to his friends. Strange, strange, strange. But now we have a new catchphrase.
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Black Party 2007 Trailer



The Saint At Large has YouTube'd a bit of the movie starring transexual porn star Buck Angel (NSFW), filmed for last year's Schwartzwald-themed Black Party, which I fake live-blogged afterwards. The music is Brainbug's ominous trance classic, Nightmare. This year's Black Party is March 24th. Tickets go on sale February 16th.

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Minus 10 Mittens

The temp is 8 degrees with a wind chill of -10, and I am telling you I'm not going back to gloves now that I've realized how much better mittens are. And could I look more like a chubby fireplug? Sigh.
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Super Bowl Coke Ad

The best commercial during the Super Bowl came from Coca-Cola. The crowd I was watching with roared when an apparently gay guy (wearing a pink shirt with a sweater knotted around his neck) was pulled from his red convertible so that the main character could give him a Coke. I thought it was cute. The "gay kiss" Snickers ad didn't go over so well with some folks, but I liked it.
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Morning View - Fake Break

A fake living room set up to promote Bravo's Top Design attracted a couple of transit workers to take a break on the platform of the S train, underneath 42nd Street.

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Sunday, February 04, 2007

No Kiddies = No Marriage For You!

The Washington State Supreme Court recently ruled that the state could prevent gay and lesbian couples from marrying because the state has a legitimate interest in preserving marriage for procreation.

In a clever response, gay marriage activists have filed a state initiative that will allow only couples capable of having kids to marry, and require that they file "proof of procreation" within three years of the marriage. If not, the marriage would be annulled. It will also require that couples married in other states provide proof of procreation and will make it a crime to get marriage benefits without meeting the procreation requirement.

The Washington Secretary of State has accepted the initiative as a potential ballot measure. Activists need to get 224,800 signatures to get it on the November ballot.
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Saturday, February 03, 2007

Valentine's Day With The Big Voice

I was all set to write a post encouraging attendance at The Big Voice, the critically-raved off-Broadway musical about, written by and starring two gay men in a 22-year relationship. This is the slow time of year for theatre attendance and when the shows with less than packed houses tend to fold. Then I got the following press release:

An interfaith commitment ceremony hosted by the Actors Temple, The Actors Temple Theatre, and the hit off-Broadway musical, THE BIG VOICE: God or Merman? will take place on February 14th in honor of V-day and in honor of love.

Dozens of same sex couples will proudly celebrate their commitment to each other in a public demonstration of their devotion, loyalty and love after the 8pm performance of The Big Voice onstage at the theater. February 11th thru 17th is Freedom to Marry Week in the United States.

Join Rabbi Jill Hausman and THE BIG VOICE stars Jim Brochu and Steve Schalchlin, who have lived together as a couple for 22 years, as they bear witness to a miracle on 47th Street. Rabbi Hausman and Jim Brouchu, who is also ordained, will conduct the inter-denominational ceremony.

Rabbi Hausman commented, "I welcome all couples to The Actors Temple, Congregation Ezrath Israel, who together wish to present themselves for an interfaith ceremony of commitment. We invite those who want their union to be blessed in dignity and love, in acceptance and respect, and as a recognition of their intention to live together in the community as a married couple."

If you've been putting off seeing The Big Voice, you've got no excuse to wait any longer.
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Weekend Links

Belinda Carlisle dazzles at in-store appearance. - Boy Culture

Prediction: Bears, by a hair. Ahem. - The Cup Of Joe

Meth-related ER visits drop by 30% in SF. - Michael Petrelis

Openly gay high school quarterback dies in car crash. - ESPN

Activists object to Tuscon TV expose' on park cruising. - Box Turtle Bulletin.

Out Of It

I still thought it was the Baltimore Colts.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Storms Tear Up Central Florida

Thanks very much for all the kind emails asking about my family regarding this morning's tornados in Central Florida. I am touched by your concern. My people are all OK, the storm did the most damage in Lake and Volusia counties, where at least 14 were killed. Orlando is the thunderstorm capital of North America, but seems have been spared this time. When I lived in SF, I actually used to miss the storms, crazily enough. One time we had a lightning storm there and it made the newspaper.
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INRI

The Church Of Scientology thinks that Tom Cruise is the messiah. I don't know, I always expected God to be, you know, taller. And a top.
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Fighting Back: Good As You

New Yorker Jeremy Hooper, author of the vital gay news blog Good As You, today takes on a man who has sent him violent threats after viewing Jeremy's recent appearance on the PBS gay newsmagazine, In The Life.
An easy Google search has ID'd the man as a Philadelphia business owner and Jeremy names him today. Something tells me that if you are in the business of wholesaling steaks to restaurants, you definitely do not want to piss off the chefs of your town, as I've heard that sometimes chefs are teh gay. Go read.
UPDATE: Watch Jeremy's episode of In The Life.
UPDATE II: This just in: Haters are not so smart.
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Sharon Stone Digs The "F" Word

"I've been called a bitch - and a lot worse - for years. And you know what, so what? People who think that aren't going to change their minds. And I wouldn't dream of sending them to therapy to 'rehabilitate' their feelings. How absurd. Please, I call all my gay friends 'big fags'." - Sharon Stone. Opinions?
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Spitfire Spitzer

"Listen, I'm a fucking steamroller, and I'll roll over you and anybody else." - New York Governor Elliot Spitzer, who yesterday tripled the proposed expenditure for gay community health programs. That proposal may get shot down, there has been some outcry against his new budget, but like many, I continue to be impressed with our new governor. In just over a month in office, Spitzer has implemented many changes meant to thwart corruption and lobbyist influence in Albany.
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I Will Hold You Ten Times

My apologies for this rerun from my archives. My dear friend Daniel Johnson, who threw the most kickass Groundhog's Day birthday parties for himself, would have been 50 years old today. His was a life that burned brightly and I am illuminated still. Daniel Johnson, 1957-1997.

I Will Hold You Ten Times

1. I will hold you, Daniel

2. The lesions don't bother me. I will hold you.

3. I will pretend nothing is wrong when you want me to pretend and when you want me to hold you, I will hold you.

4. I will make plans with you to go to your favorite places that we both know you can no longer go and I will sit with you and look at your pictures of these places and I will hold you.

5. I will ride with you on the train to your doctor's office and when you get sick in the station, I will hold you.

6. I will see the Post-It notes you put all over the house reminding yourself to do everyday things like "Turn off stove" and "Lock front door", and I'll pretend the disease isn't robbing your mind and when you tell me something for the third time in ten minutes, I won't let you know, I will hold you.

7. I will go to Safeway with you because you need to get out into the world, and when the diarrhea overwhelms you and you shit your pants in the middle of the store, I will call us a cab and in the cab, I will hold you.

8. I will make you mix-tapes of our favorite songs from last summer, just like you asked me to, and when the memories make you sad instead of happy and you throw the tapes in the trash, I won't get angry, I will hold you.

9. I will sit up all night with you, because the fevers and night sweats won't let you sleep, and in the morning I'll change your drenched sheets and help your out of the shower and when you weep from the sight of your withered body in the mirror on the bathroom door, I will hold you.

10. I will hold you, Daniel.

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Thursday, February 01, 2007

Newsom Fucks Up (And Around)

San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newson, the darling of some gay marriage activists, has been exposed for having an affair with the wife of his election campaign manager. Newsom is up for re-election this year and faces a grassroots campaign urging openly lesbian state Sen. Carole Migden to run against him.

Not all gay marriage proponents are Newsom fans. Some activists working on the issue have been critical of Newsom's February 2004 unilateral declaration that gay marriages would be legal in San Francisco, calling the move "political grandstanding" and ultimately detrimental to the cause. The marriages that took place in San Francisco were later ruled invalid.

Gay marriage activists that had been doing the tedious legislative groundwork towards legalization suddenly found the rug pulled out from under them, as Newsom's spotlight-grabbing tactic eroded the then slowly improving climate for approval. Others (myself included) suspected at the time that Newsom could even be covertly working for the Republicans. Obviously, this new scandal will increase the call for Sen. Migden to oppose Newsom this fall.
UPDATE: The SF Chronicle thinks this scandal may hurt Nancy Pelosi.

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Hairy Potter Googlebomb

One of the top search terms on the 'net in the past few days has been "Harry Potter naked", thanks to Potter star Daniel Radcliffe's buff turn in a London production of Equus. Naked Harry Potter pictures showing Daniel Radcliffe nude in photos are causing bloggers to have a field day laying fake Googlebombs in their posts, in order to drive traffic from those seeking those pics of Harry Potter naked. Naked Harry Potter pics, who needs 'em? Not me. And I don't need naked pics of Paris Hilton, or naked pics of Britney Spears, naked pics of the Super Bowl, or naked pics of Playstation 3.

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Nobel Nomination For Al Gore

Al Gore has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for his tireless work to publicize the issue of global warming. Those eligible to submit nominations include former Nobel winners themselves, members of national governments, selected university professors, and members of the awards committee. The Peace category of the Nobels has been widely criticised for some of its winners in recent years, such as Mikhail Gorbachev, Yasser Arafat, and Kim Dae-jung.

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HomoQuotable - Charlene Cothran

"I must come out of the closet again. I have recently experienced the power of change that came over me once I completely surrendered to the teachings of Jesus Christ. As a believer of the word of God, I fully accept and have always known that same-sex relationships are not what God intended for us.” - Charlene Cothran, publisher of Venus Magazine, which for 13 years has targeted the black LGBT community, in announcing that her magazine would now be a vehicle for the "ex-gay" movement. First article in the new Venus: "Packing At Church: How To Top For Jesus."

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Open Thread Thursday

I'm addicted to Discovery. What's your favorite cable channel?
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