Matt Baume: A Salute To Sissies

Dr. Smith, Uncle Arthur, Mr. Humphries, and more!

HomoQuotable - Noah Michelson

"From Grindr profiles that demand 'masc only' to men like [Russell] Tovey who think their masculinity -- however manufactured, however antithetical to who they truly were when they landed on this planet -- is what makes them marketable or desirable, our obsession with what it means to be a man and what it means to fall short of that is keeping us from becoming truly liberated.

"If it weren't for my father, I wouldn't be who I am today. I could have been forced to play football in hopes that it would somehow unleash the man dozing inside of me. I could have been sent to therapy in hopes that I could be reprogrammed, repaired, made whole. I could have ended up with a belt around my neck and swinging from the light fixture in our formal dining room. But I wasn't. But I didn't. I am one of the lucky ones.

"My father died eight years ago. He never got to see the man that I've become and we never specifically talked about everything he did for me -- what he made me -- simply by loving me. Without a son of my own, it's a gift that I can only attempt to pay forward to the thousands of boys and men who come after me -- who brush past me in crowded subway cars or surround me on Facebook or might be reading this now -- by speaking up and saying I am a faggot and it didn't happen by mistake. And if you're a faggot too, I hope you know you don't need to toughen up. You never have to stop prancing. You are not a mistake." - Noah Michelson, writing for the Huffington Post.

HomoQuotable - Michelangelo Signorile

"The Benham brothers have attributes and just a general vibe that, for years, have translated as 'gay.' But obviously there are a lot of straight men, even homophobes, who now exhibit these characteristics, seemingly free to act on their creative instincts, more comfortable about it -- precisely because of the queer movement's challenge to conventional ideas about masculinity. Some of these men might be bisexual, openly or not. But a few years ago straight men who were something like this were labeled with the (dreadful) term 'metrosexual,' except metrosexuals were straight guys who were secure in being fashionable in part because they completely accepted homosexuality and supported gay rights. The Benhams decidedly do not. So have gay men actually liberated many straight men to the point that they can appropriate 'gayness' even while still being virulently anti-gay? And is that a good thing or a bad thing?" - Michelangelo Signorile, who found the Benhams "a bit flirty" during a recent interview.

Porno Pete On Butchness: Masculine Men Don't Have Sex With Other Men

STUDY: 10% Of Craigslist M4M Hook-Up Ads Seek Straight-Identified Sex Partners

According to a study conducted by Columbia University, about one in ten M4M hook-up ads on Craigslist stipulate that the author seeks only non-gay-identified men, either as fantasy fulfillment or in order to keep their man-sexin' desires secret. This earthshaking revelation will truly blow the minds every single gay man who has never seen five minutes of gay porn. Or visited Craigslist.

To examine the subgroup of men seeking non-gay-identified (NGI) men in the online sexual marketplace, the researchers reviewed 1,200 Internet personal ads posted on Craigslist and selected 282 for analysis and performed comparisons of two categories of personal ads: those seeking encounters with NGI men, including straight, bisexual, married, curious, and men on the "down low" (those who usually identify as heterosexual but have sex with men); and a contrasting set of ads that did not specifically seek NGI men. Craigslist was chosen because it is publicly accessible, highly trafficked, free-of-charge, and widely used by gay, NGI men seeking men, or men who have sex with men and women to find sexual partners.

Among the ads studied, 11% were placed by men seeking NGI partners. Although men who posted NGI-seeking ads were more likely to self-identify as bisexual, married, and/or discreet and to seek out an anonymous encounter relative to the ads of comparison men, only 24% of online advertisements seeking NGI men were posted by men who were themselves non-gay-identified. This suggests that many of the posts are placed by gay men seeking NGI men, perceived by some gay men to be more masculine, dominant, or "straight-acting."

See? MIND. BLOWN. Of much greater interest is the study's observation that the authors of these ads are also far less likely to request safer sex and condom use, should one of these allegedly NGI men express interest.

The analysis revealed that men seeking NGI partners were significantly less likely to mention that they wanted to have safer sex/use condoms (15% vs. 33%) and were more likely (66% vs. 42%) to omit mention of condoms or safer sex in their advertisements. "This suggests that these men are more likely to be looking for and willing to engage in sex without a condom which may place them at greater risk for HIV/STI transmission than men who are not seeking non-gay-identified male partners," said Dr. Schrimshaw, who is assistant professor of Sociomedical Sciences at the Mailman School of Public Health.

The researchers speculate that older, less fit, or less masculine men may perceive themselves as having "less bargaining power" in the sexual marketplace and therefore are more willing to place themselves at risk for STDs in order to get laid. I'm guessing that most of us here have also deduced that sad fact.

Regarding the timeless "NGI men are inherently hotter" trope, years ago when hearing such claims from friends, I would pose a hypothetical scenario and ask which of two identical twins they would most like to have sex with if one is gay, one is straight, and both are equally masculine. Without exception, the straight twin was selected. Usually that was followed by inane rationalizations based on stereotypical examples of social misbehavior by gay men. "Hey, I didn't say you were gonna date him." Further prodding, however, very often elicited a confession of the belief that the straight twin would definitely be a top. Which magically makes him more masculine even though they are equally masculine. Norman, coordinate! Cue the long discussion about self-loathing and all the other baggage in its gravitational pull.

A friend once pointed out a handsome young father waiting with a stroller while his wife window-shopped on a Soho corner. He pondered, "What is it about men with babies that I find so damn sexy?" Thinking it was a rhetorical question, I gave him what I thought to be the obvious answer anyway. "Because right in that stroller is the physical proof that he has sex with women. And for you that instantly makes him more desirable than any similar gay man." The argument that followed convinced me to stop with the dime-store psychoanalysis and just let my friends lust idly for straight men they're not going to bag anyway. But I still won't let them say "straight-acting." That's a paddlin'.

Feminism Causes Male Suicide

"In 2010, more than 38,000 people killed themselves in the United States – and over 30,000 of them were men, Helen Smith, a forensic psychologist, points out in her book Men on Strike. It’s the problem of a culture that often treats men as if there is something inherently wrong with masculinity, with what makes them different from women — and looks to feminize them. Men who are less interested in marriage and responsibility are only being rational in that context, Smith argues." - From a National Review article on Smith's book. In the linked interview, Smith goes on to blame food stamps, paternity suits, and uppity college-educated women. Free Republic, of course, has posted the article in their Homosexual Agenda section.

No Hetero

Scientists Play "Spot The Bottom"

Researchers at the University of Toronto wanted to know (for some reason) if "naive observers" could look at the faces of gay men and determine whether they were tops or bottoms.  From the abstract:

In Study 1, we found that naïve observers were able to discern men's sexual roles from photos of their faces with accuracy that was significantly greater than chance guessing. Moreover, in Study 2, we determined that the relationship between men's perceived and actual sexual roles was mediated by perceived masculinity. Together, these results suggest that people rely on perceptions of characteristics relevant to stereotypical male-female gender roles and heterosexual relationships to accurately infer sexual roles in same-sex relationships. Thus, same-sex relationships and sexual behavior may be perceptually framed, understood, and possibly structured in ways similar to stereotypes about opposite-sex relationships, suggesting that people may rely on these inferences to form accurate perceptions.

Or maybe some of the more masculine men in the study were not willing to identify themselves publicly as bottoms. Not even for science. 

Today's Gay Advice Request To NYT

Here's the most recent letter sent to New York Times gay advice columnist Steven Petrow:

Dear Civil Behavior: I am a straight suburban mom who is very supportive of my gay teenage son. He’s confident in who he is but he’s also vulnerable to hostile comments from those who might find him too “flamboyant.” Recently he came home from school upset because another gay teenager in his school’s Gay Straight Alliance expressed distaste for flamboyant gay men “because they ruin it for the rest of us.” To my ears that sounds no different from homophobic comments made by his straight peers. It seems to me that the gay community should be supportive of any individual’s expression of sexuality, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone. Isn’t that what you’ve been fighting for – the right to be who you are and not be forced into someone else’s norm? — Suburban Mom in N.J.

Give us your answer then go see how Petrow responded.

HomoQuotable - Christopher Doyle

"The mission of SPLC's hate campaign is three-fold: 1) Character Assassination: spreading false and misleading information on their website and via the media about therapists who offer professional services to individuals with unwanted SSA; 2) Fabricate evidence and embellish the facts about the so-called 'dangers' of sexual orientation change effort (SOCE) therapy; and 3) Recruit vulnerable and disgruntled clients to take legal action against organizations that offer assistance for those struggling with unwanted SSA in hopes to put them out of business. The SPLC's method of character assassination is simple. Repeat a lie loud enough and long enough, and people will believe it. I personally have experienced this issue from both sides – I once lived a gay life, and today, I have a wife and children and no longer experience homosexual feelings." - Christopher Doyle, director of the "ex-gay" brainwashing and child torture clinic, International Healing Foundation, writing for the Christian Post.

RELATED: Doyle also is (or was) on the board of directors for PFOX.  His current group was founded by freakazoid crackpot Richard Cohen, whose "therapy" includes beating pillows with a tennis racket while screaming "Why? Mommy, why?"  Two years ago I encountered Doyle in the parking lot of the Philadelphia hotel hosting that year's NARTH convention, where he had a sputtering, fluttering, big girl attack when I took his photo. (Because he is totally now a masc/musc pussy-loving cured straight dude.) When I kept taking photos, Doyle put his hand on his hip and hissed, "I don't need this. Why don't you just sssssssstop!"

UPDATE: Doyle has responded to me in the comments at the Christian Post: "Wow Joe, you're so intolerant. Don't you have anything better to do with your time than protest and hate people?"  This, from the man who literally lobbies against anti-bullying laws and enables the gay-bashing of children.

UCLA Study: GOP Women Are Prettier

World Net Daily is promoting a study by a UCLA graduate student which claims that Democratic female members of the U.S. House tend to look butch compared to their delicate feminine GOP counterparts.

“Female politicians with stereotypically feminine facial features are more likely to be Republican than Democrat, and the correlation increases the more conservative the lawmaker’s voting record,” said lead author Colleen M. Carpinella, a UCLA graduate student in psychology. According to a report on the UCLA website, “The researchers also found the opposite to be true: Female politicians with less stereotypically feminine facial features were more likely to be Democrats, and the more liberal their voting record, the greater the distance the politician’s appearance strayed from stereotypical gender norms.”

The study also claims that Democratic male members of the House look more "traditionally masculine" than male Republicans.  But according to the totally unbiased researcher, that's OK, because it's "unnecessary for Republican men to exhibit masculinity through their appearance. Their policy advocacy and leadership roles may already confer these characteristics on them."  

How To Raise A Butch Boy

The new book by homophobic wackadoodle Doug Giles.

(Via Christian Nightmares)

Rant Of The Day

The topic of the below rant is certainly one of most well-worn discussions in our world, but we haven't talked about it here in quite a long time. From the work-unfriendly Tumblr titled Dear Chill Masc Bro:

Dear patrons and staff of the DC Eagle

Y’all faggots need to get with the goddamn program. Your cult of masculinity being so threatened by the presence of women and femininity is ridiculously tired. Sharing the bathroom with someone with long hair should not be something you need to externally process. Especially not with the person who you made feel uncomfortable in the first place – talking about how she has a lot of ‘balls’ to be around your boring, tired man baby scene. Honey – you ain’t tough, hardcore or interesting. Then, I hear you wouldn’t let the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in because drag queens don’t fit in with your ‘image’.

Gay men: wake up. You have some deep running sexist bullshit in your community. In the past week I’ve had to tell off multiple men who talked about how vaginas were ‘gross’ or ‘have teeth or something’. If you are a (queer/gay/bi) man and you witness someone talking derogatively about (cis and trans) women or bathroom policing and don’t call that shit out – you are aiding the reproduction of a violent society. That means rape, unequal employment and housing access, domestic violence, transphobic, sexist and whorephobic murders, sexual harrasment and a whole world of horrifying shit that women are constantly targets of.

You are profiting off that system, but in the end it will drag you down as well – because no matter how much you try to assimilate into the system by stepping on the backs of your sisters – queerness will always be associated with femininity. Despite whatever Heroic Homo Sex BS you try to pull, the effects of sexism will always reach out and grab a hold of you. And until you step up, I hope they do.

(Via JMG reader Eddie)

Look Magazine Flashback

Embiggen the image or go here. I scored 11!

Paint Company Butches Up

A Canadian paint company has relaunched their selection of colors, but this time with "more manly" names.

The original names were geared toward women, just as nail polishes are marketed with witty shade names (Essie’s “Ballet Slippers,” “Not Just a Pretty Face,” and “Sole Mate,” for example). “When it comes to paint names, it’s all about the emotional connection and our research shows that men and women tend to relate to paint names differently,” Alison Goldman, a spokeswoman for CIL Paints, says. ‘‘Studies show that while a larger percentage of women tend to choose paint colours for their home, it’s often men who give the colours a final nod.”

The company spokesperson says the relaunch is meant to be "hilarious" and that they are trying to fill a "funny void" in the paint industry.

Jesus Digs A Macho Macho Man

Chris Crocker On Femme Vs. Butch

Early YouTube superstar Chris Crocker (who's looking quite different these days) delivers a rant about the tension between masculine and feminine gay men.

HomoQuotable - Kevin Troughton

"For many gay men 'straight-acting' is highly attractive, but 'straight' is even more so. So if you're looking for a description of yourself that will have the maximum appeal on your dating profile and can't use 'straight', for obvious reasons, maybe 'straight-acting' isn't so bad. It's clear and descriptive, and it's fit for purpose, providing that you can overlook the implication that '-acting' means you're just putting it on. [snip]

"And what if the pressure to be 'straight-acting' gradually squeezes out camp behaviour? Will we have lost something important? Perhaps we should be pleased to see it go, an unnecessary relic of a time when gay men risked prosecution and when a lisp and a limp wrist were a relatively safe way of communicating your sexuality to other men. Or maybe it would be a sell-out, allowing ourselves to be railroaded into behaving like straight men – and, what is more, the kind of straight men who are most likely to give us homophobic abuse or a beating.

"Perhaps gay men should view 'camp' in the same way as we view a minority language or regional accent, something to nurture and encourage, even if we don't speak that way ourselves." - Guardian UK columnist Keven Throughton, in a piece titled "The End Of Gay Men Being Camp."

HomoQuotable - Mike Alvear

"Why do so many effeminate gay men prefer in their partners the very masculinity they've bleached out of themselves? The obvious answer is that they're attracted to their opposites. But that answer only goes so far. Effeminate men may lust for their masculine counterparts but most masculine men don't return the favor.

"Effeminate men get hoisted on their own chiffon petards. The more they take on effeminate characteristics the less able they are to attract the kinds of guys they want to sleep with. This is a mating absurdity. Imagine birds trying to attract mates with red and white plumage when the objects of their affection are attracted to yellow and green. The mis-matched mating call of the merry marys brings up a great question: If effeminacy is counter-productive to attracting the kind of sexual partners you want, then why not butch it up? Is it because like being gay, being effeminate isn't a choice?

"Nobody knows what fuels the gay flame -- nature or nurture. Some believe gay guys turn sissy because they're naturally nelly and some think it's because they're conforming to a culture that expects it. I've always maintained that effeminacy is like obesity. Sometimes it's glandular, but mostly it's cultural. There's an undeniable Pansy Vortex in gay life. You fall into it with baggy jeans and a t-shirt and climb out of it with spandex up the crack of your ass." - Mike Alvear, writing for the Huffington Post.

Read the entire essay.

RELATED: A lot of you took issue with Alvear's last essay quoted here.

Quote Of The Day - Joan Collins

"There's a big difference between the male stars of bygone years and today's slightly metrosexual-looking actors. Johnny Depp, Leonardo Di Caprio and Sean Penn are all wonderful actors, but they are chameleon-like when it comes to their place on the masculinity meter. As for today's TV stars, to me they seem just like ordinary, faceless men cut from the same male cookie-cutter. I don't recognise most of them, and in any case their star doesn't burn brightly for very long on TV nowadays. Viewers are fickle and shows are cast off the networks faster than old bait." - Joan Collins, writing in the UK Daily Mail. According to Joan, George Clooney is the only real man in Hollywood today. All the rest are feminine shadows of the glory days of rough, butch hunks. Whatever, lady.